Sunday, February 23, 2014

Ghonchu talks on the telephone - Part two

Link to part 1

Ghonchu was a smart, competitive professional who had the excellent ability to talk to people face-to-face. However, his telephonic conversation skills were yet to improve, hitherto as seen previously.

Ghonchu was having his regular afternoon siesta in his office cabin when sudden music filled his cabin - "Main tera hero oo oo hero oo". Ghonchu turned comfortably in his sleep feeling happier with the music. He began to dream of singing these words to Sweetu

The music continued - "Tu mera hero oo oo Tu mera hero". Ghonchu's subconscious realized that it was highly unlikely that Sweetu would sing those words back to him and jerked wide awake suddenly as he realized that was his phone ringing.

Hello”, spoke an obviously irate Ghonchu.

A Voice spoke, “Dear Sir, Nēḍu eyirṭel viniyōgadārulu kōsaṁ oka goppa āphar undi....

Ghonchu’s irritation increased. He had been rudely awakened by a salesman from his never-to-be-fulfilled dreams and was then talking in a language he did not understand - this felt like the last straw. However, Ghonchu if nothing was the consummate gentleman. Rahul Dravid would have been impressed by the tone in which he replied –
"Telugu Radu.” (I don’t know Telugu).

The Voice continued, Krindi āphar vivarālu unnāyi...

Ghonchu’s irritation increased. But he took a deep breath, retained his calm remembering Sweetu, and repeated again in a louder voice –
“Telugu Radu. English or Hindi.”

There was a pause. Ghonchu wondered if he should try speaking Telugu, but his past experiences in speaking a language he didn't know had not been good.

The Voice came over from the other end, “Tood ede eirtel oofrs oone pisekool perm int.”

Now Ghonchu got disturbed. Sweetu was the last thing on his mind now. He now changed his tone. Virat Kohli would have been proud him.

“Arey, you **** idiot. Telugu Radu, Telugu Radu. Kannada Gothila. Tamil Teriyaada. English or Hindi. English or Hindi. Understand??” 
(Ghonchu added 'I don’t know Kannada' and 'I don't know Tamil' as a safety measure not sure what language was being spoken).

Again there was a pause. A longer one, this time. The Voice at the other end finally spoke humbly and slowly –
Sir, Engleesh .. onlee .. speeeking.

Ghonchu revisited the words being spoken last –
“Today the airtel offers one paise call per minute.”

Ghonchu disconnected the phone!!